Some people make up lies that make people want to kill each other. I do no such thing.
Sometimes, it’s intentional to use people as pawns, and sometimes, it’s not.
That’s why when I find out that someone lied on me, I am not surprised by people’s reactions. I’m a very nice woman of color with a clean history, and so is my son, so people are always trying to find something wrong with one or both of us. Brown people hate on each other, too.
However, I do encourage all to ask questions, talk to the other parties, tell the people what is being said about them, and who said it. Get everything out in the open, and keep the lines of communication flowing.
There is a high likelihood that, once everyone hears the truth, you can start working on solving the problem swiftly.
If anyone ever says something bad about me, tell them this, “I am going to tell her, so you better be telling the truth.”, and then tell me.
When I was a little girl, I told on one of my teachers for hitting me in the head with a phonics book. Then, I told my mom and the conversation went something like this.
Dana: [getting off the bus] Mom, the teacher hit me in the head with a phonics book.
I don’t recall her asking why or what did you do.
Mom: Dana, you better be telling the truth. You better not be lying to me, you understand? Because if you’re lying to me, you’re in trouble. Are you being honest? [long, dramatic pause]
Dana: Yes, she hit me in the head with my phonics book.
Mom: Get in the car. We are going to go talk to her.
Dana: OK [becomes quiet as a mouse]
We arrive at the school, and I’m silent because she’s fuming mad. We go in.
Mom: You sit in the hall and don’t move.
After that, I’m not sure exactly what happened, but it wasn’t pretty. I could hear things going on in there. My mom was super sweet (at least to me), but I followed her around everywhere. She was very pretty with really long hair.