Tonight, I ventured into the neat pawn shop called The Pawn Shop Outlet in Glassboro, with some earrings that were a gift. It was about 5:45 PM. The salesman was very rude. I wasn’t sure why he was so rude, but the exchange was very interesting.
I was glad that he had the conversation on tape. I don’t think they are allowed to have sound without telling the public, but there are places here with cameras that have sound, and the public does not know.
The reason I was happy that he had the occurrence on tape was because they could review it and use it for training.
The salesman did something during the conversation that has happened to me countless times: He lied, saying I was yelling at him. I know I wasn’t yelling but I did find it interesting that he tried to provoke me to yell by accusing me of something that I didn’t do. Accusing anyone of something that they didn’t do could prompt a negative, or odd response, or even make them panic, making them victims twice, first by the false accusation and then by the false presumption of onlookers who may not know what happened. I can barely assume that they’d be a victim twice without knowing if they had an Anxiety Disorder or OCD, because then it would really mess them up. They’d be perservating on the occurrence for weeks. My friend is autistic, and she is getting her Masters’ Degree in Psychology, and what happened to me could have really upset someone like her. As most people know New Jersey has the highest Autism Rate in the United States of America. I’m happy that I kept it together.
Once I contact the management, I will suggest that they use the material as a tool for training.
Crudeness and rudeness in a town that you are trying to improve and grow can be problematic. I can’t tell you how many sales I’ve seen lost because of blatant discourtesy to the customer. In order for Glassboro to be a better place, the businesses have to learn to be nicer in uniformity. This will make more people want to send their children to Rowan University, and bring businesses into Glassboro. As a volunteer for the Greater Glassboro Group, and a volunteer in the community I have personally invested several hundred hours of my time making Glassboro more desirable, I’d hate to see it fall to the wayside and be negated by incivility. Incivility amongst the people, businesses, public services and community centers destroys the gentrification process. People who are middle class and higher have no reason to feel compelled to accept mediocre service. Poor people should not accept discriminatory service.
Now, I will admit that once I saw this man acting like a child, I spoke to him like a child, but at no point did I yell, or lose control. We have to keep in mind that I am the customer. He was provoking me. My son and I have had a lot of that here. It’s been so bad, I could sue the town. That is not a bluff, I really could, and I’d win.
The Mayor will be leaving office soon, and sexism and racism are strong. If they really cared about the Mayor, they would want his town to be successful, like I do, and not play games that would hurt his name towards the end of his service, but these men don’t care. They just care about winning. They just want the title and whatever kudos come with it. It doesn’t matter who they hurt, even if it’s an innocent young man, and the mother he needs.
The other thing I reflected on is if this was indeed a race issue, did this man perceive me as yelling, because of the darkness of my skin? Or did he know the stereo-type of the angry black woman, and assume that I would be a willing participant in his game? Maybe that is just how Dustin* treats everyone. Or was it because I was a female, or because I was short? Maybe it was a combination of many things.
It’s the social science of things that makes me dissect these random occurrences with the intent of eventually pinpointing the pattern, and understanding the motive for the perpetrators’ actions.
Regardless, if Glassboro wants to grow in any significant way, and maintain healthy relationships along with securing long-term business transactions, it will need to address the civility issue.
There is no way around this folks. It has to get done.
Thank you for taking the time to read this and be nice as pi.
*The salesman’s name was changed for privacy reasons.
